Tips to change your negative thinking and start taking action
When we first start out in business, we often accept any old job that comes our way. Some years ago, when I had just emigrated to Spain and had started my copywriting business, I did exactly that. ‘I need money!’ I said to myself, and so I grabbed what I could. I said yes to everything, only to find that most of the clients were not aligned with my values and what I really wanted for myself. They kept haggling me down, always looking for a cheap deal, and I over-delivered and undercharged. Now, as a business coach, I know my worth, and this is what I help my clients with as well. Because most times it is not your offer or quality of work that is attracting bad clients and little money, it is your mindset.
Do you truly believe in your abilities to earn good money with what you do? Be honest. Or do you still feel others are probably better than you, you still have a lot to learn, and you can’t ask that sort of price for your work? Here is a secret: those ‘other’ people are not any better than you, and you are totally capable. The problem? Self-limiting beliefs.
Ancestral poverty stories
Money mindset goes back way down the ancestral line. If you, like most people in the world, come from a family who worked all hours of the day for little pay, then negative money stories will have been past on from generation to generation. Always being careful with money, not spending it on luxury, the feeling of not being worthy, and a deep belief that rich people are ‘not like them’, and you’ll never reach that level of income. Although you may say that you don’t think like this at all, stop for a second, and think about your own behaviour as a person and as a business owner.
Do you head for the sales racks in the shop straight away (even though you like the shoes in the window better)? Do you always tell yourself that ‘you don’t need a lot of money’ and you ‘don’t care for luxury’ (even though you envy that friend who owns a gorgeous house with the super stylish interior)?
Let’s do a few more, now focusing on your behaviour as a business owner…Do you feel 100% confident in naming your prices? Do you hold a deep belief that you deserve to be paid a lot of money for the work you do? Do you show up as the successful entrepreneur you want to become? Do you track your income and have a date with your finances regularly?
If these questions made you feel a bit uncomfortable, then there’s work to do.
Money mindset and self-fulfilling prophecy go hand in hand. If you always think that people are out to rob you, then that is what you get. If you expect to always be ‘the poor artist’, then you’ll never be rich. It’s about the vibes you give off, and if your vibes are positive and confident and you show up like that, then you will attract a very different type of client. If you have a chip on your shoulder, and always feel hard done by, then you will keep being treated that way – confirming what you already believe. ‘See?’ you’ll say to yourself, ‘that’s just how it is, people are like that.’
Creating a better relationship with money
Of course, checking your bank balance at least weekly, chasing up outstanding invoices, making sure there are no money leaks (outdated subscriptions and standing orders for example), and having a good accountant, will all help to improve your relationship with money. Today, however, I am going to talk about something you can do to change your own energy around money. For those of you who know me, I am big on doing the inner work, as it has helped me greatly to manifest all kids of changes in my life, and I want to the same for you.
There are a lot of different techniques to change your mindset and self-limiting beliefs around money and other issues, and as long as you do them consistently, they all work. EFT tapping techniques, affirmations, journaling, writing down your income goals daily, creating vision boards, meditation. What you focus on will grow, so focus more on what you desire, and take inspired action to set the wheels in motion.
Exercises to improve your money mindset:
1. Look at your past for clues
This is an exercise I am borrowing from money mindset queen Denise Duffield-Thomas, who became very successful with her books and programmes (‘Get rich, lucky bitch!’ being one of them). She is brilliant at building up your money mindset and breaking through pesky money blocks.
The exercise I found helpful is this one: find any memories of old arguments or resentments over money, or anything that might possibly explain why you act the way you do now with your money. Write them all down in your journal. Go through it chronologically. Start with your earliest memory, and work your way up. You will see how these memories still influence your income today. What can you learn from them?
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2. Yoga Nidra and planting seeds in your subconscious
This is not the type of yoga doing postures and building up strength, but instead this is much closer to meditation. With yoga nidra you lie down, very still, and listen to a guided sequence slowly focusing on and relaxing each part of your body. It gives you a deep relaxation, which helps greatly with any anxiety you may feel, but it also includes another ingredient: manifestation.
During a yoga nidra session, you are being asked to repeat a short affirmation three times in your head, which, when done regularly, will enter your subconscious and plant seeds.
The more you do this, the more likely these seeds will sprout, and manifest in your reality. Affirmations can be things like ‘I am calm and confident’, ‘I am happy and healthy’, but, in the case of money mindset, you may want to say ‘I attract money with ease’. The key is to really feel this affirmation as if it has already happened and is true. The more you practice this, the more you will see that this actually works. A yoga nidra video I like, is this one on Youtube (instead of watching it, I just listen to it).
3. Changing your story – decluttering negative beliefs
I do this exercise with my clients too when we break through self-limiting beliefs and the old impostor syndrome, but as these things often are closely related to money mindset, this is equally helpful to manifest money. It’s about rephrasing your thoughts and stories in your head.
If you are always thinking you’re unlucky and things are not going well for you, then the universe will give you exactly that. It is a self-fullfilling prophecy.
If you often have thoughts like ‘oh typical, another bill’, ‘this always happens to me’, ‘they’re probably going to screw me over’, etc, then you will keep attracting situations that confirm those beliefs. If you change this habit of negative thinking, reality will change for you.
Now, I am certainly not saying that money suddenly will fall out of the sky and into your lap, but the transformation in your subconscious mind will start having an effect on everything in your life, including better clients as well as other positive changes you may desire.
Try saying these things out loud right now, and notice how it makes you feel:
‘Good things happen to me every day’
‘The universe is taking care of me’
‘Thank you for the blessing of all the good things in my life’
‘Thank you for all these high paying clients coming my way’
Manifesting abundance requires vigilance toward everyday thoughts around attracting money and clients, and in the beginning you feel completely ridiculous doing it. ‘What the fuck am I doing, thinking this will make a bling bit of difference, you idiot’. But treat it as a daily practice, and keep going, make it a habit. Flex that success muscle, as the more you plant those seeds in your head, the more your mind will start believing in the things you tell it (remember that impostor syndrome, and how this has held you back? Now turn it around s an experiment!).
Your subconscious mind will believe anything you tell it, good or bad, remember that. And when the mind believes good things are happening, and you literally feel it is true, then they will. You may think it sounds crazy, but what’s the worst that can happen?
Taking inspired action
Ok, ok. Let’s be realistic here, I’m getting all woo-woo.
It’s all very well to lie down and meditate, journal yourself silly, and send affirmations into the universe…but you also need to put the wheels in motion.
What you focus on will grow, but not if you hide under a rock. Take inspired action, to help the universe along! Inspired action and a positive mindset are a dream team.
If you want bigger clients and more sales, decide who these clients are. With your newly found positive attitude and confidence, you will discover that it becomes much easier to contact these types of people. After all, they are just people, who probably struggle with mindset issues, just like you.
You will no longer doubt yourself, and will feel happy to share your offers and how you can help them. Instead of going into sales calls and meetings expecting the worst (‘they’ll probably say no’, ‘they’ll probably think I’m too expensive’, ‘they’ll probably think I’m rubbish’), you now go into them expecting a YES, and truly believing in this outcome.
Other inspired actions could be setting achievable money goals each month, and creating a simple strategy to get there. What do you need to sell to reach that number? Who can you contact? What type of content will support reaching this goal? How can you show up differently today online and in person to resonate with your ideal client who is willing to pay your prices?
Whatever you do, persevere, and keep doing the inner work. Your thoughts are just thoughts, and not reality. You can change your own thoughts. You can change your own reality. Don’t ever believe those negative stories in your head. You are totally worthy, you know your sh*t, your products and services are worth a lot of money. But if you keep holding yourself back and expect the worst – then your reality will be just that.
What are you going to do differently today?
Work with me
I work with new entrepreneurs 1-to-1 for up to six months, helping them to break through their self-limiting beliefs, and to get better at marketing so they attract more clients. Are you ready for it? Check out my programmes or book a free Strategy Session to get clarity on your next steps: